Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Honeymoon, by James Patterson

In short, this book stinks.  On a 5-Skunk Scale, I give it a 4.  I would give it a 5, but there were no glaring grammatical errors, it was printed on nice paper, and I couldn't find a picture of 5 skunks.

Why did I read it in the first place? Because the blind audio librarian at MAB (Malaysian Ass'n for the Blind) asked me to record it, and I didn't have the heart or the hubris to say no. I spent over 20 hours reading aloud the story of Nora Sinclair, an irresistibly gorgeous woman with a compunction to seduce rich men when they employ her to decorate their gazillion dollar mansions, to collect red Mercedes Benz convertibles and other designer trinkets from them, and finally to kill them. I would go on with the other things about this novel that appalled me, but there's no point.  Either to the book or the complaints.

That Patterson's fiction is so popular is profoundly depressing to me. I can't for the life of me understand its appeal. Do readers want to live vicariously through characters who are obscenely rich, exquisite, and clichéd?  Do they want a plot in which they know the end before they've begun?  The fact that Honeymoon has 117 2-page chapters is telling.  It's aimed squarely at people with 2-page attention spans.

I love a good, entertaining, escapist novel as much as anyone.  I just couldn't escape from this one fast enough.


  1. Oh come on now... We know it's really your memoir! ;-)

  2. I must admit I have read a few of James Patterson's books. He has written a couple of thrillers that have made it to the silver screen, but generally, I find his characters rather undeveloped and shallow. After a while, it got boring, and the last book of his that I read was downright ludicrous.

    But I wonder, though, what you think of those Stephen King's books that I adore so much....those no-brainer slash-slash books and movies. You must be even more 'profoundly depressed'. :P


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